Hero Spotlight: Michelle "Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway"

1. What is a big challenge you had in the past and what did you do to overcome it?

Life smacked me right upside the head, slapping me with a thyroid cancer diagnosis at age 37. WAIT, WHAT? My life had been pretty sheltered up until that point. Adversity was not in my vocabulary. I had not been challenged physically, mentally or spiritually in this sort of capacity prior to this. I lived through my darkest days in the months and years to follow. I know that thyroid cancer is the “good cancer” (insert sarcasm), but the thyroid is a vital organ, touching every cell in the human body. Without it, my body was out of balance, toxic and sensitive. Looking back, I am not sure that I can fully blame the thyroid cancer for all of my symptoms. My ego apparently took over when I decided to get breast implants the same year I had my thyroid taken out. Yes, you read that correctly. I felt sorry for myself. I thought that breast implants would make me “feel better,” and lift my spirits after having endured cancer. I was feeling great until about a year after my enhancement. My panic attacks surged as well as an exacerbation of a whole host of other issues. I suffered from fear, tinnitus, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and insomnia to name a few. My body was thrown off balance once again and maintaining homeostasis was a challenge. Both of these scenarios were meant to happen. I needed a good kick in the butt or “wake-up” call. You see, I was asleep at the wheel of life. My ego was in the driver seat, but my soul no longer wanted to ride shotgun. It was time for my soul to take the wheel. I found myself crawled up in fetal position crying my eyes out, praying for my healing to anyone who would listen. I said, “Please, GOD, Source, Angels...please heal me so that I can help heal others.” Well, apparently “something” was out there paying attention to my pleas for help. All of a sudden people and things were coming into my life in a synchronistic fashion to help me heal. Someone would recommend that I see an integrative doctor, or I would read about a new supplement that was a perfect match for my ailment. I serendipitously happened to meet a local intuitive/psychic who later became my first Reiki instructor. The more I opened up spiritually, the more my healing advanced. I eventually became a Reiki Master and practiced daily on myself. I give full credit to Reiki and subsequently my shamanic training for being the catalyst to my healing, my spiritual awakening and heightened intuition.

2. How do you see yourself today? Has it changed from when you were younger?

Growing up as an identical twin was a challenge because I lost my sense of self. Hence, the term “identical twins” is a paradox of sorts because I would surmise that twins often lose their sense of identity. In my case, I reverted to the background in our relationship. My sister took the reins as the “outgoing” one, and in turn, spoke on our behalf. We shared very similar experiences and stories, so why not let her be the spokesperson? I let her shine, which inevitably dimmed my light. This pattern of dimming my light continued into adulthood. I do feel like this contributed to my throat chakra blockage (aka. Thyroid cancer). I found it difficult to communicate my feelings, speak my truth or put up boundaries. I exhibited codependent behaviors, a common theme throughout my family dynamics. Therefore, after focusing on healing my throat chakra as well as my spiritual, physical and emotional bodies, I uncovered my authentic self. I was finally able to speak my truth without hiding behind a false sense of self. I removed my breast implants and discovered that I loved myself just the way I was intended to be~naturally beautiful. Healing also provided clarity around my relationships and codependent patterns. Ultimately, I found my life purpose of helping others heal. As an adult, I have addressed those inner child wounds of being “invisible.” It has taken years of deep healing, but this work has brought me to fulfillment and peace. I no longer dim my light. In fact, I have stepped into my divine power and embraced my gifts to be shared with the world.

3. If you could, what advice would you give to your younger self?

Looking back, I would have a lot of advice to give to my younger self. I would say, hey you~ this journey is not for the faint of heart. Your anxiety that you endured as a child and adult will subside. You will step out of the shadow of your twin sister and shine your light as far and as wide as you can imagine. Your cancer diagnosis and complications from breast implants are all carefully plotted scenarios that you conspired to experience prior to coming to this planet. You needed these wake-up calls in order to quiet your ego and unlock your soul. Once you do, you will find the self-love, confidence, peace, relationships, life purpose and healing that you desire and deserve. Life will flow alongside the Universe. You will have the ability to manifest all of your desires. You will live out your purpose of sharing your light with others. You will write books, speak, provide healing and channel words of wisdom for others navigating their own wake-up moments. Your soul will grow and learn, which is the primary reason you are on this planet. So, kudos to you, kid, for sticking it out. I am proud of you!

4. What mantra/quote/word do you try to live by that has helped you on your journey?

One mantra that I have used throughout my journey is “feel the fear and do it anyway.” This applied when I was young, navigating my anxiety. I didn’t let it stop me from living my life. I continued to use this mantra during my cancer diagnosis and breast implant complications. Every day brought challenges, but I persevered and fought. I connected with my soul, which led me to the people and things that were in alignment for my healing. This mantra continues to apply to my life today. I felt fear as I recently wrote my book...what if no one will read it? What if they don’t like it? I felt the sinking feeling in my gut, but I showed up to my computer every day and continued to write. I refuse to let my egoic emotions block my soul’s ability to shine. I know my purpose...and I will continue to pursue it every day of my life. Nothing will stand in my way!